My broadband’s back at home where it belongs! – my baby!
No more running to the internet café every minute of the day (and night). No more long trips on the bus to get there. I’ll no longer see the freaks at the back of the cafe – some engrossed in pornos and minimising their browser window everytime someone walks past.
No longer will I be chatted up by the owner of the café (who was actually quite nice. He used to give me fruit – which was sweet. But he also used to stare at my screen at times which used to piss me the fuck off). There was this other guy. There’d be other computers but I noticed he’d often either sit right next to wherever I was sitting or a few computers away. No more of that either.
No more dirty keyboards. No more cigarette smoke drifting in from outside, burning my eyes. Or the sound of the traffic constantly drumming through.
No more holding my pee in til I get home. No more using McDonald’s toilets when I can’t hold it in any longer. And when McD’s toilets shut at 11pm, no more buying a packet of crisps in the nearby shop because only ‘customers’ can use their frikkin toilets.
No more drunk students, pervs, smelly people, too-loud people, too-chatty people on my journey back on the bus.
No more coming home with a city of viruses on my USB stick.
Yeah. My baby’s back. And ooooh it feels guuuuuuuuuuuuud.